So many times we hear the question, “Can we have it all?” As mothers, we often find it hard to balance our family life with our work life. And does that leave any time for yourself? I often hear from fellow busy moms that they don’t have time for themselves, or that they feel guilty about taking that time just for them. And let me just say, I totally get it!
When I gave birth to my 3rd child, I also had a 2-1/2 year old and a 15 month old at home. Talk about crazy! Trying to run on very little sleep while taking care of a young family is so difficult. There were days I would break down and cry, wonder how I would carry on. I felt overwhelmed. Not only was I overwhelmed with taking care of my 3 boys, but I hated my body because I had completely let myself go during my pregnancies.
I wanted it ALL. I wanted the perfect little family. I wanted to be the perfect mother to my 3 kids. I wanted to be the perfect wife to my husband. I wanted the perfect body to go along with it all. But continually seeking this perfection in my life became a source of stress for me because I always felt like a failure at everything. If everything wasn’t perfect, then I was failing.
…until I realized that having the perfect balanced life just isn’t possible.
Yep, the perfect balanced life just doesn’t exist, so please stop searching for it and start taking the pressure off of yourself. I only wish I had known this 5 years ago.
During our typical day, we can only focus on one area at a time, whether that be our children, our job, our business, ourselves, the chores. Whatever it is, when you are focusing on one area, you need to give up a bit in the other areas.
As a work-at-home mom, I’m constantly faced with this. It’s so easy for me to get into something and lose focus of my time. Some days, I’ll be concentrating on work so much that I forget about my kid’s snack! I need to continuously stay conscious of my time.
To help me stay focused, I have a calendar to keep track of my business, family activities, my workouts, and my other commitments. I am constantly checking my calendar to make sure I stay on track with my day. I even set little reminders on my phone with activities or other things that I would easily forget, such as drinking a big glass of water every 1 – 2 hours.
I also write down my goals. I write down my goals on a weekly basis. This helps me stay on track with what I’m working towards. And these goals aren’t just business related. One of my weekly goals is to spend 20 minutes alone time each day with each child. Another goal is to go on a date night once a month with my husband. If I didn’t write this down, I would be lost. I wouldn’t know where to direct my attention. This system has allowed me to accomplish GREAT goals!
I’ve also discovered that I can’t do it all. I can’t run a business, take care of 3 kids, maintain a clean house, cook, etc….all by myself. I’ve learned to have others help me as I become busier. For example, I’ve hired someone to clean the house every 2 weeks. This allows me an extra 4 hours to work and be with my family, a well worth it trade-off!
So I ask you…what are you worth? What is your time worth?
EVERYONE struggles for balance, even if they seem to have the perfect life. It’s a constant tightrope act. However, the more you are AWARE of your time, the easier it becomes to manage. Even if you have fallen off the tightrope, it is possible to get right back up and once again find your own version of balance.
***If you have any questions about this article or would like more information about how I organize my day, please contact me here, I’m happy to help!***